New Reminders: Confidence

Self-confidence is a belief in one's own abilities and judgment, specifically, the conviction that one can successfully handle challenges and achieve desired outcomes.  It's a positive feeling of trust in oneself and one's capacity to perform tasks effectively.  Confidence is not about arrogance or feeling superior to others, but rather a quiet, inner sense of capability.  A lack of confidence can keep us from doing the things we know we should do.  It can also keep us from moving forward in our jobs, in our relationships, and in our very growth as a person.

Confidence in one’s self is an important character trait that helps us accomplish our goals and take the necessary risks to take on challenging tasks and face difficult or dangerous situations.  The question is, where does confidence come from?  For some, the way they were raised influenced their development into a confident person.  Parents who model confidence in themselves, teach children by example.  Parents model confidence when they are willing to show their children that is okay to try, even if things don’t always work out exactly as planned.  They are teaching their children that we can all learn from our mistakes.  Allowing children to take risks, even if they might fail, can help them to learn persistence and perseverance (to try, try again).  Praising children’s efforts as well as results, goes a long way toward developing self-respect as well as the self-confidence to set higher and more worthy goals for themselves.  Success builds success, and confidence grows as we become more skilled and are able to accomplish more and more.

Along with good self-confidence, we also want our children to recognize and accept their limitations. We all need to know when there are things that are beyond our control and our capabilities.  We can’t all be heart surgeons or professional plumbers.  There is always a chance that we will need to turn to others for help or support.  In such cases, we have to rely on those who have trained for and are confident enough to provide the expertise we lack.  Likewise, even the most accomplished specialist in any field cannot save him or herself from the heartaches and tragedies that befall us all.  For that we need to rely on a supreme being, who can pick us up when we fall or fail.  The bible tells us that God is always there for us, and He has sent the Holy Spirit to guide us.  Knowing that, and relying on Him, gives us confidence that even when things seem out of control, our heavenly Father is in control, and we will be fine.

Psalm 55:22 advises, "Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you," while Psalm 46:1 says: "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble." Other verses emphasize God's love and strength, such as Isaiah 41:10, "Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”  We can rely on God to give us the confidence to keep going even when confidence in ourselves is not enough.