Reminders: “How’s that Working for You?”

The above is a question made famous by Dr. Phil McGraw of the Dr. Phil show on TV.  When people are having problems in their relationships, he likes to ask how their strategy for getting along is working for them.  Quite often the guest being interviewed suddenly has to admit that it is not working well at all.  One of the usual problems is that one person tries to tell the other person how they should behave.  They feel like their take on the problem is correct.

It’s like the old joke where a young lady thinks she has married Mr. Right only to discover (to her horror) that he thinks his first name is, “Always”.  We all like to think we are right most of the time.  Some people are so sure that they are right that they never want to admit otherwise, even when proven wrong.  Then comes the second question Dr. Phil likes to ask, “Would you rather be right or happy?”

Dr. Phil doesn’t mean that you always have to give in and let the other person think they are right all of the time.  He simply means that we need to allow for the possibility that the other person might be right some of the time.  The only one who is always 100 percent correct is God, and most of us even question that from time to time. 

We all know that God answers prayers when we take the time to ask, but we don’t always like His answers.  The interesting thing is that once we start listening for the right answers, not just the one we want to hear, we realize that we don’t always have to be right to be happy.  We need to be open to other perspectives––other possibilities.

If you want a better strategy for learning to listen, look for a church where the congregation doesn’t pretend to have all the answers, but will help you pray for the right answers for you. 

“Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understands obtain guidance.” Proverbs 1:5